Being a Light Even When You’re in Survival Mode

This has been the most challenging season. It seems like more days have felt like survival mode versus just regular living.

The start of COVID coincided with the birth of my second child. This season has been met with what seems like an endless cycle of at least one person in our household being sick, classroom/school closures, and feeling as though I can’t adequately handle everything on my plate. An endless cycle of the unexpected. How I miss predictability! When life is predictable, I can make plans and stick with them. I can make goals and achieve those goals. But for now, God seems to be teaching me to just trust Him to get through each day.

The month of May entailed my 14-month old getting an ear infection and roseola at the same time, followed by me experiencing excruciating tooth pain, only to find out I would need a root canal, followed by the baby getting hand foot mouth disease just days after he recovered from the other two illnesses, followed by me getting a mysterious GI illness the entire time we were on vacation in Colorado. All of this in the midst of a very busy season in my full-time job.

Sometimes, it just seems like too much. I feel like I can’t possibly be making a difference because I’m just trying to keep myself and my family above water.

Maybe you can relate. Maybe you are in a season of survival, when you feel like you’re just holding on for dear life.

But sometimes, even in the midst of all of the craziness, we are still making a difference. Those prayers prayed before bedtime are going down deep into our kids’ hearts. The Jesus songs we are intentional to play in the car stay in their heads and come out their lips at school all throughout the day. Those times when it takes literally all of our strength to just get ourselves and our family out the door and to church on time? Those are seeds. They are making a difference.

I had one of those moments recently when I realized the importance of these seeds. As I was dropping my 4 year old off, his teacher pulled me aside and said, “Yesterday, during breakfast, Luke was telling everyone how much Jesus loves them.”

My heart exploded in pride. Something has stuck. And that something is the most important thing.

So life is crazy now. So I can’t seem to make plans and stick with them because of things out of my control. What is in my control? Loving God. Teaching my kids what it means to love God. I can do those things. I can praise God no matter my circumstance.

And every once in a while, I’ll get little glimpses that it’s sticking. That the seeds I’m planting are growing.

Don’t lose hope. Keep your head up, and keep doing what you know is right.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9

2 thoughts on “Being a Light Even When You’re in Survival Mode

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